mid-life crisis???

So tonight I hear this song, the most cheesy, 80's song ever, and it struck a chord with me. Here are the lyrics...

I've Never Been To Me
( Charlene )

"Hey lady, you lady, cursing at your life~You're a discontented mother and a regimented wife~I've no doubt you dream about the things you'll never do~But, I wish someone had talked to me, Like I wanna talk to you.....Oh, I've been to Georgia and California and anywhere I could run ~I took the hand of a preacher man and we made love in the sun~But I ran out of places and friendly faces because I had to be free~I've been to paradise but I've never been to me~Please lady, please lady, don't just walk away'Cause I have this need to tell you why I'm all alone today~I can see so much of me still living in your eyes~Won't you share a part of a weary heart that has lived million lies....Oh, I've been to Niece and the Isle of Greece while I've sipped champagne on a yacht~I've moved like Harlow in Monte Carlo and showed 'em what I've got~I've been undressed by kings and I've seen some things that a woman ain't supposed to see~I've been to paradise, but I've never been to me
[spoken] Hey, you know what paradise is?It's a lie, a fantasy we create about people and places as we'd like them to be~But you know what truth is? It's that little baby you're holding, it's that man you fought with this morning~The same one you're going to make love with tonight~That's truth, that's love......Sometimes I've been to crying for unborn children that might have made me complete~But I took the sweet life, I never knew I'd be bitter from the sweet~I've spent my life exploring the subtle whoring that costs too much to be free~Hey lady......I've been to paradise, (I've been to paradise) But I've never been to me(I've been to Georgia and California, and anywhere I could run) I've been to paradise, never been to me"

Lately, I have been feeling unsettled, seeing a lot of the negative in my life. I see what I didn't get, what I can't have, what I always wanted. I am trying to see what I *do* have, trying to see that sometimes those other things are not as important. My husband wrote me an email (as he does every day) and he said "I love you so much. You are truly my best friend and the love of my life, and I am so lucky to have you." This should have made me so happy, but instead, I frowned. Why? What is wrong with me? He knows something is wrong, he can sense it, and he is trying to make everything better, but he can't. He can't, because it is not his to fix. Only I can.
I am hoping this is all some weird age related thing, hormonal maybe. Like the song lyrics say, "I have never been to me". I don't even know what that means, but it must mean something because that is what I keep thinking about. Unlike the character in the song, I have never done or experienced anything that would make me "worldly". I was a good girl, and I got married and had babies. I never dated, didn't even attend high school (home schooling). So now I am wondering, did I miss out on something? And does it even matter, now that I am "happily" married? How dare I be so selfish? He loves me, he adores me, he babies me. And I? Am grateful. And I love him. I do. So what is my problem? When did I start questioning all these things, and how am I supposed to fix it? For now I will keep on the way we have been. He has no idea what is going on in my head, he has no idea what I am thinking about. He loves me, unconditionally, and he is a better person than me. I am lucky. I will tell myself that repeatedly, until it sinks in. And maybe this will all pass and I will feel silly for saying anything at all...