OT

So lately I've been wondering about the way OT has affected my life, my outlook. It was about a year and a half ago when I found it. I started getting spoiler info about Survivor and somehow made my way to OT. I hadn't even posted yet and was already addicted to it. One of my first memories is wondering if the peeps there knew eachother in real life...all this talk about a bar, about what to eat for lunch, the inside jokes. Very daunting. I saw a thread about wedding favor ideas and felt confident enough to post. In retrospect, I realize that anyone whose first post is on OT looks a little suspicious. Like a previous (banned) poster or something. Anyhow, I liked the way it felt to have that tiny bit of interaction with people, strangers even. So I stayed.

I think of myself as humble, and in that regard I kept a very low profile, always recognizing my DAW count was low and that I was a newbie. One thing I did do right though, I read all the guidelines and most of the Help forum. (I'm still shocked when I see older peeps testing sigs and whatnot there) So I gradually began posting more, and felt even more able to post in the BB forums since there were many new peeps there and it was less intimidating.

I am not sure why, but I gathered enough courage to start a thread (one of only two, the second as a favor to a friend who needed good vibes and prayers) but anyway, I started the thread asking for a sig pic and also about the bar. That night, thanks to help from a few peeps, I found it. It was incredible! Nicest people ever in there. Woeisme, Glow, Cappy, Bennyboy, to name a few. It was so nice and welcoming. Later the bar enabled me to get to know others too, CSTL, Asrai, Puffy, RollDdice, Tara...god I could go on here. The very next day it felt better being there (on OT), like I was finally in on the joke. I was (and am) still a little timid, but I feel secure there.

Over the last year, my point of view has changed on many, many things. I've learned a lot about how the world thinks. At least, how people outside of my world think. There are so many topics that I was too indifferent about, before. There are people that I would have never had the chance to know. I've shared some before, but I'll say again that I grew up in a very conservative, sheltered environment. I didn't even work in the real world when I grew up. I had a short lived job as a teenager but I wasn't interested in getting to know people (except a couple of cute co-workers). I didn't care about politics, religion, sexuality, pudding. I have gradually begun to see some changes in my thinking, in my comfort levels, my actions, even. OT has given me a freedom I didn't have before. Like my eyes were finally opened.

The old me? Wouldn't feel comfortable flirting (with anyone, much less women!!). I wouldn't have been able to tell you what the difference between a Democrat and a Republican was. I wouldn't have know that some people are so overly religious that they turn people off. I wouldn't have known about all the wonderful peeps who cannot get married, because they are gay. I wouldn't have known that Bush is an asshat. I wouldn't have known that there is a place, a community, in which every race, sexuality, religion, and "class" are accepted, loved, appreciated and in some cases just tolerated.

I am grateful to OT. To the people who have become my friends. Even knowing that in my situation I may never be able to meet them, or talk to them. Yet they are here, and they care. And I care for them. Crap! Now I'm getting all mushy. I just want to say I love you. And thank you.




(I've also learned that my spelling and punctuation could use some help)