I was thinking about my 'How We Met' story and I realized I left something out. It wasn't a big detail, but it made me think. The night I went to get DB back, I had decided to sleep with him after knowing him for a year and a half, and resisting. Why did I all of a sudden decide that? It wasn't a rash decision, based on wanting him back. It was largely due to the fact that two nights before that, I had gone out with another guy, for the first time, and he asked me to sleep with him. For some reason, knowing that this *other* guy, who my parents coincidentally would have "approved" of, was pressuring me to do something I wasn't ready to do, changed my thinking. He also shared with me details about other young couples, who I thought were like me, raised the same way, (to wait until marriage) who were already sleeping together. I felt like WTH? Am I the only one being good? Why? And why shouldn't DB be the one who gets it, after waiting so patiently for so long?
My point is, or what this made me wonder was, how often are we conditioned, or influenced, by what others are doing? If everyone you know smokes pot, doesn't it seem silly to draw a hard line about it? (as the only example I can think of this late)
It's easy (theoretically) to not break the big laws, but what about the other stuff? I was willing to change my stance on something I had ingrained in me, based on the knowledge that others were "doing it". If everyone else seems okay with something, are you more likely to go along with it, even though that little voice in your head is telling you not to? Sometimes I justify certain thoughts, and even actions, by thinking that everyone else I know has either done it, or something similar, and I don't want to be the only one left out.
This blog entry is not coming out the way I wanted, so tomorrow, I will go for the smut. *sigh* I'm just too tired to try and clarify it, or redo it.
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17 comments:
Hmmm... peer pressure?
I have usually done what I feel is right for me, regardless of what anyone else was doing. I guess I'm a rebel. *grin*
If your friend jumped off a bridge would you do it too? /Dad's pearls of wisdom. LOL! How many times did I hear that as a teenager?
Yes, I'm often influenced by what others are doing or have done. I've fought with that little voice in my head many times too mm. Sometimes the little voice wins, but it's getting easier to block it out. *grin*
When I was young I gave in to peer pressure. Now, sort of but not really? I won't do something just because everyone is doing it if it isn't something I really have no interest in. However if there is something that I might want to do, I could be pushed into doing it because everyone else is doing.
Lightsy beat me to it!
I think that if it's something I'm not completely sure about, then I'm more likely to try it if people whose opinions I respect do it. But if the people doing it are people that I don't particularly care for, then I won't do it.
Oh, and your smut rating is going down.
If you ask the friends that I had while growing up, they'd tell you that I was the one that did the stuff. You know, like, I was the friend jumping off the bridge.
Actually, it makes sense. If there's something you want to try or do you feel a bit more comfortable doing it when you know others who have done it without hurting themselves, dying, or having an adverse reaction.
Oh! And would we have such a wonderful Blogland if we weren't influenced a bit by everyone else?
*grin*
Funny you mentioned that momma! I was dead set against blogging before. Why would I be so vain to think anyone wanted to read my dribble? Now, I know it's not just about that. For some it's therapeutic. For me, it's another welcome diversion when OT is slow and a GREAT opportunity to get to know my favorite peeps alittle better!
I let peer pressure start me smoking but after two days in health class listening to the effects of smoking, it took me all of two days to quit and never do it again. I was about 15, my friends smoked pot and I hung out with them but never tried it myself because I just knew it wasn't for me.
Now drinking on the other hand, that was a different story.
I left a sorta major part of my story out too but I'm not sure if I should add it in. I'll have to think about it but it may clear up some misconceptions about a former and important relationship.
You should already know, I think *smile*
Everyone else is becoming a lesbian. I think you should too. *grin*
I am at the point in my life that I don't give a rats ass what anyone or everyone is doing or saying. I am just gonna be me.
Does that mean vols is going to become a lesbian? I'm so confused.
I tried pot because of peer pity, actually. I had a friend who was so pitifully desperate to belong that she'd do anything. One day, that thing was...wait! it was hash - "botts" they called it. Didn't do anything for me. I didn't like the vodka the one day either.
I felt so badly for her. I'd made my peace with not being popular, but she just couldn't. I'm so glad her life worked out. It could have been so much worse, and nearly was.
I had peer pressure when I was younger too, but not now.
I'm with Arkie. I definately pay attention to what other people think if they are people I respect.
Though when I'm really lost, it's my grandma I ask and she's been dead for 9 years.
As for peer pressure when I was younger? It seemed that all my friends had sex within a one year period.
I didn't resist that. I think I was first.
Im looking for some smutty code, but can't find anything.
No, I've never done that. Oh wait, Elephant Seals. Never mind!
As for the sex thing, I wouldn't have needed peer pressure. I wasn't conditioned to wait until marriage. Actually, I don't remember being conditioned at all.
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